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Professional Services

Choosing a Therapist

Equine-Assisted Work

Qualifications & Memberships

Beyond Words (Journal)

Professional Services

Choosing a Therapist

Equine-Assisted Work

Qualifications & Memberships

Beyond Words (Journal)

Professional Services

Choosing a Therapist

Equine-Assisted Work

Qualifications & Memberships

Beyond Words (Journal)

Are We Forgetting the Importance of Simply ‘Being With’?

therapeutic reflections Sandy Reay 28/05/2019 therapeutic reflections Sandy Reay 28/05/2019

Are We Forgetting the Importance of Simply ‘Being With’?

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A woman looks up at a horse, which is facing her, in an outdoor setting with trees and a fence in the background.

About

I am an integrative psychotherapist and counsellor working with children, adolescents and adults. My practice is rooted in the belief that therapeutic change emerges through relationship — through feeling emotionally safe enough to be seen, understood and met with attunement.

I work particularly with neurodivergent children and young people, looked after children, developmental trauma, attachment difficulties and communication beyond words. Alongside private practice, I work within schools, residential settings and multi-agency services, supporting children, families and the wider team around the child.

My approach integrates psychodynamic and attachment-based understanding with creative, experiential and nervous-system-informed ways of working. Depending on the needs of the individual, this may include play, sensory materials, metaphor, emotional regulation work and equine-assisted therapeutic practice.

Before training as a psychotherapist, I spent over two decades within the advertising and film industry, leading creative teams and working closely with narrative, emotion and human communication. I later transitioned into child services and psychotherapy, where my frontline experience within SEND, residential care and school settings deepened my understanding of developmental trauma, neurodiversity and relational work.

I am particularly interested in how we communicate through behaviour, movement, silence, sensory experience and relationship — especially when words feel unavailable, unsafe or insufficient. My work is grounded in curiosity, presence and the belief that meaningful therapeutic change often begins beyond words.

Psychotherapy

Close-up of an adult holding a child's hand, both hands appear to be connected gently.

A close-up black and white photo of a woman making a heart shape with her hands around her face, focusing on her eye and hand gestures.

I offer both counselling and psychotherapy for children, adolescents and adults. Counselling often focuses on a particular difficulty or life challenge and is usually shorter term, whilst psychotherapy offers the opportunity to explore the deeper patterns that shape how we relate to ourselves, others and the world, often through longer-term work. Together, we decide which approach best meets your needs.

Some people arrive with clear difficulties they would like support with. Others may struggle to put their experience into words. In my work, I recognise that communication can emerge in many different forms: through conversation, play, behaviour, movement, sensory experience, silence and relationship.

My approach is integrative, meaning I draw from different therapeutic approaches depending on the needs of the individual. This may include psychodynamic psychotherapy, attachment theory, neuroscience, creative and experiential work, emotional regulation, and embodied, nervous-system-informed approaches.

I work particularly with:

Neurodivergent children and young people
Looked after children and those with experiences of developmental trauma or attachment disruption
Children and adolescents experiencing emotional, sensory or relational difficulties
Adults seeking reflective, relational therapeutic support
Families and carers navigating complex emotional and developmental needs

Sessions are tailored to the individual and may include:

Talking therapy
Play and creative exploration
Art, metaphor and storytelling
Sensory materials and embodied awareness
Emotional regulation work
Equine-assisted therapeutic practice
Relational and attachment-focused exploration

Choosing the right therapist is an important decision. If you're unsure what qualifications or professional registrations to look for, you can read more in ‘Choosing a Therapist’ section.

Professional Services

Neurodiversity & SEND

I work with neurodivergent children and young people navigating emotional, sensory, social and relational challenges, including those with intellectual disability, autism, ADHD, ODD, epilepsy and other additional needs.

My approach is neurodiversity-affirming and grounded in curiosity, regulation and relational understanding rather than behavioural judgement alone. I recognise that communication, emotional expression and regulation can emerge in many different forms, and support is adapted sensitively to the developmental, cognitive and sensory needs of each individual.

Alongside private psychotherapy practice, I work collaboratively with schools, Alternative Provision, residential settings, fostering and adoption services, and multi-agency teams to support children, young people, families and the wider professional networks around them.

Consultation, Training & Workshops

I provide consultation, training and workshops for schools, SEND services, Alternative Provision, residential care, fostering and adoption services, and wider professional teams.

Grounded in relational, trauma-informed and developmentally attuned practice, my work draws on both clinical expertise and extensive frontline experience supporting children, young people and families across education, care and SEND settings.

Areas of focus may include neurodiversity and SEND, emotional regulation, behaviour as communication, developmental trauma, attachment, communication beyond words, supporting looked after children, and relational approaches within educational and care environments.

Whether through consultation with individual professionals, team discussions or tailored training workshops, my aim is not simply to share knowledge, but to encourage reflective thinking, deepen understanding and strengthen relational approaches around the child. Together, we can develop more attuned, emotionally informed ways of understanding and supporting children and young people within the systems that care for them.

Communication Beyond Words

Some children and young people communicate through behaviour, movement, rhythm, sensory engagement, silence or emotional intensity rather than spoken language alone.

I have a particular interest in supporting non-verbal and minimally verbal children, and in exploring how therapeutic relationship, emotional safety and regulation can foster communication, connection and belonging.

Developmental Trauma, Attachment & Looked After Children

I work with children and young people who have experienced developmental trauma, attachment disruption, loss, neglect or relational instability, including those within fostering, adoption and residential care settings.

These experiences can impact emotional regulation, identity, trust and relationships. Through therapy, consultation and collaborative working, I aim to create safe relational spaces where emotional experiences can begin to be understood, processed and integrated over time.

Reflective Practice

Working within SEND, trauma and care settings can be emotionally demanding and complex.

I offer reflective practice spaces where professionals can explore the emotional impact of the work, deepen relational understanding and think collaboratively about the needs of the children and young people they support.

These sessions aim to strengthen curiosity, attunement and emotional containment while supporting staff wellbeing and reflective capacity.

Team Around the Child

Where appropriate, I work collaboratively with parents, carers, schools, social care professionals and multidisciplinary teams to support a shared understanding of the child's emotional and developmental needs.

My aim is to help create greater consistency, communication and emotional containment around the child, recognising that meaningful change often emerges through attuned relationships and collaborative thinking rather than intervention alone.

At the heart of all my professional work is the belief that growth happens within relationships. By bringing together therapeutic understanding, reflective practice and collaborative working, it becomes possible to create environments where children and young people feel understood, supported and able to thrive.

Equine-Assisted Work

Equine-assisted therapeutic work offers a unique relational space where communication, regulation and emotional awareness can emerge beyond words.

Horses are highly attuned to movement, emotion and nervous system states, often responding not to what is said, but to how a person feels, relates and presents in the moment. This can create powerful opportunities for self-awareness, emotional regulation, confidence-building and relational connection.

My equine-assisted work is grounded in relational and trauma-informed practice and can support children, adolescents and adults who may find traditional therapeutic environments overwhelming, inaccessible or difficult to engage with verbally.

I offer both one-to-one and group-based equine-assisted sessions, alongside therapeutic workshops and collaborative work within alternative provision settings.

Sessions may support:

Emotional regulation and nervous system awareness
Confidence and self-esteem
Relational safety and trust-building
Anxiety and emotional overwhelm
Neurodivergent and sensory needs
Communication and connection beyond words
Teamwork, boundaries and social interaction

Depending on the needs of the individual or group, sessions may integrate reflective therapeutic discussion, creative exploration and experiential learning alongside interaction with the horses.

Alongside private therapeutic work, I collaborate with alternative provision and educational settings to provide equine-assisted therapeutic sessions, relational workshops and emotionally supportive group experiences for children and young people who may struggle within traditional educational environments.

At the heart of this work is the belief that healing and connection can emerge through presence, relationship and embodied experience — often beyond words.

A person with their hair tied up wearing a dark jacket stands near a brown and white pinto horse in a green outdoor area with dense trees in the background.

A woman with brown hair, wearing plaid pants and boots, holding a whip, standing next to a brown horse with a black mane, in an outdoor sandy enclosure with a fence and a lamp post, with hills and trees in the background.

A person standing in front of a large black horse in an outdoor arena with mountains and trees in the background.

Choosing a Therapist

Choosing a therapist for yourself or your child can feel overwhelming. With so many different titles, qualifications and approaches, it is not always easy to know what to look for.

Whilst training and professional registration are important, there is no single "best" therapist. The right therapist is someone who has appropriate training and experience, works safely and ethically, and offers an approach that feels right for you or your child.

If you are looking for therapy for a child or young person, it can be helpful to ask:

What qualifications and professional registration does the therapist hold?
Do they have specialist training and experience in working with children and adolescents?
Are they insured, DBS checked and regularly supervised?
What therapeutic approach do they use, and how do they adapt this to each individual child?
How will parents or carers be involved in the process?

The therapeutic relationship is one of the strongest predictors of positive outcomes. Feeling safe, understood and able to build trust over time often matters just as much as the therapeutic model itself.

If you are unsure whether counselling or psychotherapy is the most appropriate option, we can discuss this together during an initial consultation and decide on the approach that best meets your needs.

Qualifications & Memberships

Master of Arts & Diplomas

MA - Child & Adolescent Counselling & Psychotherapy - Terapia / Middlesex University

PG Dip - Gestalt Therapy - The Gestalt Centre / London Metropolitan University

PG Dip - Equine Assisted Learning & Development - IFEEL / Pearsons

PG Dip - Autism and Mental Health - National Centre for Autism and Mental Health / The British Psychological Society

Continuing Professional Development

Adoption Support Counselling - Barnardo’s

Working Psychotherapeutically with Eating Disorders

Supporting Bereaved Children - National Counselling Society

Memberships

Contact

If you would like to enquire about therapy, professional consultation, equine-assisted work or collaborative services, please feel free to get in touch.

I welcome enquiries from individuals, parents, carers, schools, Alternative Provision settings and professionals seeking relational and developmentally attuned therapeutic support.

I understand that reaching out for support can sometimes feel difficult, and I aim to offer a thoughtful and welcoming first point of contact.

Beyond Words (Journal)

A psychotherapist's journal exploring what it means to be human, and the stories that unfold beyond words.

Go to Beyond Words Journal

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Sandy Reay Psychotherapy

East Hertfordshire & London

Email: Sandyreaypsychotherapy@gmail.com